Q: Why don't polish women use vibrators?
A: It chips their teeth.

Q: How do you sink a polish battleship?
A: Put it in water.

Q: Have you seen the polish mine detector.
A1: Put you fingers in your ears and start stamping the ground with your foot.
A2: Start backing up and waving the detector in front of you.

Q: How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree?
A: Wave to him.

Q: How do you tell which is the Groom at a Polish wedding?
A: He's the one with the CLEAN bowling shirt.

Q: How do you stop a Polish army on horseback?
A: Turn off the carousel.

Q: How many Polaks does it take to change a light bulb?
A: 3. One to stand on a chair and hold the bulb and the other two to spin the chair.

Q: What do you do if a Polak throws a pin at you?
A: Run like hell - he's still got a hand-grenade between his teeth.

Q: What do you do if a Polak throws a hand-grenade at you?
A: Take the pin out and throw it back.

Q: How do you take census in a Polish village?
A: Roll a quarter down the street, count the legs, divide by two, and subtract one for the Jew who catches it.

Q: How did the Polish mother teach her son which way to put his underwear on?
A: Yellow in the front, Brown in the back!

Q: Did you hear about the Polak who married an Amish woman?
A: He drove her buggy.

Q: Did you hear about the new automatic Polish parachutes?
A: They open on impact.

Hear what the Poles did with all their gold medals?
Went home and got them bronzed.

Q: Did you hear about the Polak who thought his wife was trying to kill him?
A: On her dressing table he found a bottle of "Polish Remover".

Q: Did you hear about the Polish man that locked his keys in his car?
A: He had to use a coat hanger to get his family out.

Q: Did you hear about the Polak who studied for 5 days?
A: He was scheduled to take a urine test.

Q: How do Polaks form a car pool?
A: They meet at work.

Q: How do you ruin a Polish party?
A: Flush the punch bowl.

Q: What is long and hard that a Polish bride gets on her wedding night?
A: A new last name.

Q: What happened to the Polish National Library?
A: Someone stole the book.

Q: Why did the Polish couple decide to have only 4 children?
A: They'd read in the newspaper that one out of every five babies born in the world today is Chinese.

Q: You go to a cockfight. How do you know if a Polak is there?
A: He's the one with a duck.

Q: How do you know if an Italian is there?
A: He bet on the duck.

Q: How do you know if the Mafia is there?
A: The duck wins.

Q: Why did the Polak put ice in his condom?
A: To keep the swelling down.

Q: What does a polish girl do after she sucks cock?
A: Spits out the feathers.

Q: What's the smallest room in the world?
A: The Polish Hall of Fame.

Q: Did you hear about the Pole who lost $50 on the football game?
A: $25 on the game and $25 on the instant replay.

Q: Why don't Polish women breast-feed their babies?
A: It hurts too much when they boil the nipples.

Q: What do you call a Pole with 1500 girl friends?
A: A shepherd.

Q: How are a hockey goalie and a Polish woman alike?
A: They both change their pads after 3 periods.

Q: Why aren't there any suicides in Poland?
A: You can't kill yourself jumping out of a basement window.

Q: Why did the Polak stand on a toilet?
A: He wanted to be high on pot.

Polak walked into a bar with a handful of shit and said,
"Hey, look what I almost stepped in!"

Did you hear about the gay Polak?
He slept with women.